My worst childhood fear was one suffered in silence, and it permeated my sense of safety on several levels.

Now I lay me down to sleep. I pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.


--Probably some dude but I don’t really know

Those were the last words I spoke every night of my childhood. I didn’t want my mom to know I went to bed afraid that since I had basically just “made my peace” with God, he was going to come down and take me.

I was terrified NOT to say it, because what if I didn’t say it and I did die? Clearly that meant I’d end up in Hell, instead.

I certainly didn’t want to piss off GOD!

And so on.

No scary movie or spooky ghost story ever came close.


Worst fucking excuse for a prayer, EVER.

I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up, but I know I want it to be spelled right and punctuated correctly. I guess that’s something.

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