My ex-husband has this infuriating habit of texting me about things he is doing…for instance, if I ask to have one of the kids back an hour early on transition day because of a chore or something, he can’t just say they’ll be busy. He has to make whatever they’re going to be doing reaaaally important. Its usually someone’s birthday party, or dinner at his in-laws. When we were married, he was so rude around my friends that I stopped attending social functions. I got tired of answering “What the hell is wrong with your husband?”
Likewise, he would rather go to the dentist than dinner with my parents.
He had no friends . now he’s just mister flibbertygidget.
Anyway I got off track. So he will go on and on explaining their plans in detail, and always mention how busy their social calendar is.
When I respond, and dare to push the issue at all--like, do they really need to be there ( the kids)…he starts going on about how important it is for them to attend as a family blahblahblah. A few times I’ve asked when he became so family oriented (i ask nicer than that)…no matter how I broach the subject, he immediately stops texting back.
in fact, regardless of the subject, if I try to discuss ANYTHING at ANY TIME that he doesn’t like, he completely acts like I’ve stopped existing.
Narc trick to avoid accountability, and responsibility. And VERY difficult to counter. They love the tactic because when you try to put what they’re doing into words, you sound paranoid and bitchy and unstable.