ec… my special popcorn bowl anymore!
(side note: don’t worry, we don’t have kids)
Me (an hour later, hungry, belligerent, glaring at traitor bowl): Look at this lovely bowl, huh? See it? I’ma have the best popcorn in this bowl, asshole. Watch me do it.
I just wanted you to know that I totally do this, except the extended version. When the kids are at dad’s and it’s just me. I talk to my inanimate objects. I argue with them. I gossip to them.
I also self-narrate as I complete tasks…”Aaand i’m just gonna hoist you guys up here into the washer, fit ya in all nice and tight. And, now just about a half a cup of detergent and of course can’t have detergent without fabric softener..i just got this new kind because i think it smellls FABULOUS. Let me know if you like it, okay? Umm…annnd we’re gonna use the cold water today. I know it’s cold out but…”
Yeah. You get my drift. But shit, it gets so quiet when the kids are gone.
When they’re home, I talk to them. It’s not like I prefer ranting to my pillowcases while i fold laundry or the silverware as i load the dishwasher…
i just didn’t want you to feel all alone. ;)