I get where you’re coming from. I do. Scenarios such as you describe were par for the course in college for me. And when I got into drugs later, I had lots of experiences I wish I hadn’t. And I’ve accepted responsibility for them all. I have ALSO been raped. As in, IT DOESN’T FUCKING MATTER IF I LED HIM ON (i didn’t) OR HE WAS GONNA HAVE BLUE BALLS TOMORROW. IT DOESNT MATTER IF I WORE. SKIRT UP TO THERE AND GOT HAMMERED AND FOLLOWED HIM UPSTAIRS DRUNK AND STUPID.
If, once we were locked in the bedroom (even if I locked the door), he started something and I got scared and tried to stop it…he decided he was too worked up to stop and forced his way inside me, THAT IS RAPE.
Not just a regrettable sexual experience. He is bigger and stronger and I can’t stop him even though I try. RAPE.