I can’t tell you how many times I’ve started down this rabbit hole and not had the intestinal fortitude to stick it out.

It fucking TERRIFIES me. The things people in power are willing to do to stay that way. The fact that my life is something I’m 'permitted' ( and only what I’m permitted). The fact that in the age of technology, even an uprising would be nipped in the bud. That our children’s world is destined to be the stuff of Orwellian drama and there is nothing we can do about it.

It’s just too depressing to delve into what we have created for future generations.

If there even are future generations.

Because conspiracy theories always have some basis in reality, as Snowden has made all too transparent. And those involved are too blinded by power and greed and control to care that these liberties they take with our liberties could easily be the catalyst that ends us for good.

And now I’m going to try to sleep without apocalyptic dreams.


I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up, but I know I want it to be spelled right and punctuated correctly. I guess that’s something.

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