I can tell you already know this, because you seem empathetic and kind. But having a baby is not about you and your needs. It is about your fitness to turn that baby into a capable, competent adult, which you are doing (have almost DONE) by the tender age of 47.5.
I’m a 45 year old divorced mother of a beautiful 16 year old daughter and a scrappy 12 year old son and I, too, get baby pangs sometimes, especially regarding my son, who only recently stopped cuddling and who has broken my heart with his bigness. Sigh.
But women are a biological timebomb ticking away, and at 50, few if any of us are still capable of procreation. Dont you think that means something? That the babymakers can’t make new babies after 50?
I get that it isnt the same for men, which is a huge reason women like me die alone while men like you rarely do. You’ll go looking for some 30 year old family-ready newby to relive your youth with, and have kids you may not live to see grown while women like me will watch the dating pool dry up knowing all along what you haven’t seemed to consider…that baby pangs for a 47.5 year old parent are why God invented grandchildren. With grandchildren you get to keep your pros and toss those cons back to mom and dad.