Great article, even if it did make me queasy to revisit childhood and the memories of my late father that I’d rather not dwell on now that he is gone. I try to focus on the last few years of his life, and how he learned to show up for my kids in ways he never could for me. He never did stop drinking, and in fact died from an overdose of alcohol, oxy, and benzos in 2017. And, at 47, I have 20+ years on you-my ACOA status is something I have worked through (and continue to work through) ever since I, myself, got sober in 2010.
You are spot on here, and i wish I had been blessed with your insight in my twenties. Stick with it-the introspection, the sharing and talking through it, the intentional behavior shifts, and keep reframing the traits developed in that house in terms that convey strength rather than dysfunction. Those traits made you a survivor, and they made you who you are today:
Someone who can weather any storm that comes along.
Thanks for the reminder. 💜