As I’ve never owned an iAnything, I only stepped into an Apple Store for the first time a couple of weeks ago, with my 15 year-old who needed some sort of headphones, but not device.

It was the first time I really felt my age. I just couldn’t stop trying to find somewhere labeled “check-out”, possibly towards the back? Side? My daughter parked me in a corner and gave me that look of disdain only a teenager can pull off.

When I finally wrapped my head around no check out line, I scanned for a free employee who could take way too much of my money and get me the hell out of there but I couldn’t tell the difference between customers and employees.

If only I had known.

Beards, huh?

Who’da thunk it?